What is the price of empathy?

[NatalieZaki]

I think empathy comes from meeting a variety of people. If all you've known is your majority cishet white neighbourhood, you'll see everything outside of that suspiciously. I think the best way to have people be more empathetic is just by having them meet people outside of their circle. If you've seen the whole "College is brainwashing people to be leftists" argument dumbasses use, it's mostly just because in a space such as a college, you meet people from all different backgrounds and you come to understand that we are all people, with our own lives.

 

[IyoTheHelpfulWolf]

It costs 0 currency and it kicks ass

"There are no benefits to being a good person" skill issue, being a good person is its own benefit

"The world is cruel" skill issue, I am not

Immensely based, but don't be too hard on people who had their empathy beat out out of them by the world. "It's own benefit" only goes so far when a person is struggling to eat.

Post automatically merged: Mar 12, 2025

I think empathy comes from meeting a variety of people. If all you've known is your majority cishet white neighbourhood, you'll see everything outside of that suspiciously. I think the best way to have people be more empathetic is just by having them meet people outside of their circle. If you've seen the whole "College is brainwashing people to be leftists" argument dumbasses use, it's mostly just because in a space such as a college, you meet people from all different backgrounds and you come to understand that we are all people, with our own lives.

That's a good point too. Between going to a majority black school as a white guy and talking to all kinds of people online, it all really broadened my horizons. Also, I didn't really know any teachers in community college who were socialists. They mostly ranged from center left liberal to libertarian right, and most of them were pretty cool with everybody.

Post automatically merged: Mar 12, 2025

I'm wondering if it will get locked.

Honestly, this thread is pretty civil so far. As long as no one starts calling each other stupid over a disagreement, I think we'll be okay.

 

[trickybus]

I think empathy is affected by the same limitations that affect all other human emotions: it's conditional and it's finite. There's a lot of things to genuinely be upset over nowadays. An empathetic person can easily reach burnout if they overextend themselves with too many issues, something that's really easy to do in the era of social media.

Think about people who work in healthcare. It's not just physical stress that drives them to burnout: it's also mental and emotional stress. It's not uncommon in my area to encounter nurses who are cold, distant and disinterested. Thankfully, we have healthcare staff who are sweet and patient but it makes the ones who aren't stand out all the more.

I can't find it in myself to judge them harshly because their behavior is something I've witnessed repeatedly in people who deal with sickness and death on a regular basis. It's a subconscious dulling of one's empathy in order to protect oneself. We're not built to experience pain—even the pain of others—for extended periods. If we can't fix the source of the pain, the only other way to quickly deal with it is to block it out entirely.

 

[RanmyakuIchi's icon RanmyakuIchi RanmyakuIchi]

I've always felt, at least in recent years, that being empathetic doesn't cost a thing. I also feel that choosing to show kindness in a world that often looks down on it is a kind of strength all its own. It only takes a moment to show kindness, but it may make the whole day of someone who really needs it.

Unfortunately, there are people who view empathy as a weakness and will target you or attempt to push you for it. It's good to be kind but firm, and to learn to deal with bad faith people.

 

[TamagotchiTamaHero24's icon TamagotchiTamaHero24 TamagotchiTamaHero24]

There is no upfront cost. The cost is pride, which despite what Vegeta may have taught us, isn’t worth all too much when somebody is in need. Empathy does have a limit, however. Be mature in your empathy, and don’t simply give it to whomever. If someone is a known manipulator, lier, snake, or whatever else, you are more than welcome to hold back your empathy. It costs nothing to be empathetic, but your empathy in itself IS worth something, so always remember that.

 

[Yousef]

That’ll be 4.50 dollars, would you like fries on the side? Soda comes free with a coupon.

 

[IyoTheHelpfulWolf]

There is no upfront cost. The cost is pride, which despite what Vegeta may have taught us, isn’t worth all too much when somebody is in need. Empathy does have a limit, however. Be mature in your empathy, and don’t simply give it to whomever. If someone is a known manipulator, lier, snake, ow whatever else, you are more than welcome to hold back your empathy. It costs nothing to be empathetic, but your empathy in itself IS worth something, so always remember that.

I've never understood the cost being pride. You can build a good reputation on empathy and sincerity and draw in good people that way. You just have to stay alert to people who think you're an easy target rather than a friend.

 

[TamagotchiTamaHero24's icon TamagotchiTamaHero24 TamagotchiTamaHero24]

I've never understood the cost being pride. You can build a good reputation on empathy and sincerity and draw in good people that way. You just have to stay alert to people who think you're an easy target rather than a friend.

This much is very true.


You want people to like you? You want friends? You want a partner? Dude, being kind COSTS NOTHING aside from your time. You stand to gain anything and everything from being kind to others. And no, it isn’t always easy. But nothing that is truly worth having ever comes easy.

 

[RanmyakuIchi's icon RanmyakuIchi RanmyakuIchi]

I've never understood the cost being pride. You can build a good reputation on empathy and sincerity and draw in good people that way. You just have to stay alert to people who think you're an easy target rather than a friend.

I was like this as a teen, way too caught up in my own damn pride. I had to learn the hard way as I ruined friendships. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and humble that brat I used to be. Learning empathy was the seed that helped me turn my life around for the better. Pride is a fool's game.

 

[IyoTheHelpfulWolf]

This much is very true.


You want people to like you? You want friends? You want a partner? Dude, being kind COSTS NOTHING aside from your time. You stand to gain anything and everything from being kind to others. And no, it isn’t always easy. But nothing that is truly worth having ever comes easy.

It's naive to say it costs nothing but time. It costs finite emotional energy, so you have to be careful who to spend it on. Someone who just takes and takes and takes and never improves needs more help than I can give. These people are emotional vampires and are just gonna drag you down with them. Sometimes I have to make the heartbreaking decision to stop helping a well-meaning vampire and focus on people who can utilize the emotional energy I give them and turn it into self improvement. @RanmyakuIchi and @Capricorn_is_Goat are two people who flourished that way. :3

 

[TamagotchiTamaHero24's icon TamagotchiTamaHero24 TamagotchiTamaHero24]

It's naive to say it costs nothing but time. It costs finite emotional energy, so you have to be careful who to spend it on. Someone who just takes and takes and takes and never improves needs more help than I can give. These people are emotional vampires and are just gonna drag you down with them. Sometimes I have to make the heartbreaking decision to stop helping a well-meaning vampire and focus on people who can utilize the emotional energy I give them and turn it into self improvement. @RanmyakuIchi and @Capricorn_is_Goat are two people who flourished that way. :3

Bro is COOKING! Blud came in here and cooked a five course meal!

 

[Antihero]

Empathy is a rare quality these days! I try to be the voice of the voiceless whenever I get a chance IRL.

 

[RanmyakuIchi's icon RanmyakuIchi RanmyakuIchi]

It's naive to say it costs nothing but time. It costs finite emotional energy, so you have to be careful who to spend it on. Someone who just takes and takes and takes and never improves needs more help than I can give. These people are emotional vampires and are just gonna drag you down with them. Sometimes I have to make the heartbreaking decision to stop helping a well-meaning vampire and focus on people who can utilize the emotional energy I give them and turn it into self improvement. @RanmyakuIchi and @Capricorn_is_Goat are two people who flourished that way. :3

This is true, sometimes you need to step away for your own mental wellbeing. I've had friends from older days that have gone down bad roads and refuse to accept any help, despite wanting it. At a certain point frustration and grief boils over.

Also, thanks for the shoutout. Virtual hug!

 

[SageoThyme]

Empathy is a good thing to have, untempered empathy sucks.

 

[Deleted member 884]

No one outside my family members and some relatives has never been empathic with me, so why should I act differently with others? Even though they want to help, I don't need it. I don't wanna get well, because there would be no use.
I'm not empathic, never been and never will be. I like myself the way I am. Being empathic works for many people, but not for everyone. If you feel you want to, then ok.

 

[IyoTheHelpfulWolf]

This is true, sometimes you need to step away for your own mental wellbeing. I've had friends from older days that have gone down bad roads and refuse to accept any help, despite wanting it. At a certain point frustration and grief boils over.

Also, thanks for the shoutout. Virtual hug!

 

[Gold]

I think people get lost in their own hearts and get tangled up in some things, and I believe if you really broke most people down and sorted them out they would show they have a lot more than they show or maybe even realize. I know I've done some things, said some things, sometimes been way too stubborn about things that probably made me seem like a bitch and it just wasn't how I really felt. I thought it was and I got too stuck on my own issues to see it and felt bad later. A lot of people are just dumb about communication.

 

[Yuniheim]

I was like this as a teen, way too caught up in my own damn pride. I had to learn the hard way as I ruined friendships. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and humble that brat I used to be. Learning empathy was the seed that helped me turn my life around for the better. Pride is a fool's game.

Same, I never really considered myself a good person because of that, I used to be too much cold and arrogant thinking I was better than people and they were a nuisance.
I think I started to open up a little after the death of some of my family members who teached me a lot of things, even games teached me a lot about life, like Persona 3, that game helped me in some rough times to see value of life, both mine and of the others, each life has value.

The answer that I found for myself was that I needed to open my heart and try to be a better person whenever I can and if I can.
I was surprised when I played God of War Ragnarok and Kratos said something like this at the end too, I guess deep down it's true.

Post automatically merged: Mar 13, 2025

Calling another insane is another way to say ”I don't understand this other person." I'm very fond of the study of mental illness, and I'm used to the accusation.

As a rule, I never argue. It's more valuable for me to give others room to display what they want; it's the most valuable thing in the world to me. How else shall you know what someone is more than their desire, and how shall you know, save giving them unadulterated freedom?
Room to Stand, you might say.

So shall I be insane, since that's what you want.

You seem to be a very virtuous person of strong opinions, I really respect and admire that.

 

[King Koopa's iconKing Koopa]

Sometimes I think I have too much of it.

 

[GardeniaSky's icon GardeniaSky GardeniaSky]

Empathy is necessary for humanity's longevity. It's abundantly clear that every action taken without empathy pushes us further towards our own demise.

I think the price of a lack of empathy, cosmically, is much higher than the price with.

 

[Antilocal123]

I think you should expand that circle m8, if the world was lacking empathy them everywhere I went to must’ve been the last beacon of hope.

Empathy requires us to understand the fundamentals of the world and control it, it’s not something bad no matter what the pessimist pricks will tell you.

It costs nothing, and while it can overwhelm us at the end of the day there is nothing wrong with viewing the world through a more vast lens.