What is the most jank console game you’ve ever seen running?

[Not_Red]

Skyrim kept crashing my Xbox 360 as a kid
More recently, I'd say mortal Kombat 11 on switch was awful

This game looks so bad they removed all the screenshots from the eshop.

 

[trickybus]

So a game called Kamiwaza got a Switch remaster in 2022 for some god-forsaken reason, despite being the worst attempt at a stealth game I have ever seen. It originally came out on the PS2 in 2006 and since Thief: The Dark Project had already been out for several years, there is really no excuse.

The previous two videos are examples of how not to play Kamiwaza (the first video) and the "correct" way to play it (the second video). What you'll see are examples of:

• Catatonic guard AI
• Bad camera controls inside buildings
• Obnoxiously loud chase music
• Random close-ups of the PC's face for some reason (power activation maybe?)
• Tutorial prompts (?) interrupting the game every few seconds
• Running animations that convey far more speed than what the PC can actually accomplish
• Attack spamming for movement because it's faster than running
• Models clipping through each other
• Close-ups of your PC eyeballing a guard's crotch during a sneak attack
• Health bars on items you're trying to steal
• Kicks that send guards into the Earth's outer atmosphere

I'm sure there are other details that I'm missing but you get the point.

 

[UnDubious]

So a game called Kamiwaza got a Switch remaster in 2022 for some god-forsaken reason, despite being the worst attempt at a stealth game I have ever seen. It originally came out on the PS2 in 2006 and since Thief: The Dark Project had already been out for several years, there is really no excuse.

The previous two videos are examples of how not to play Kamiwaza (the first video) and the "correct" way to play it (the second video). What you'll see are examples of:

• Catatonic guard AI
• Bad camera controls inside buildings
• Obnoxiously loud chase music
• Random close-ups of the PC's face for some reason (power activation maybe?)
• Tutorial prompts (?) interrupting the game every few seconds
• Running animations that convey far more speed than what the PC can actually accomplish
• Attack spamming for movement because it's faster than running
• Models clipping through each other
• Close-ups of your PC eyeballing a guard's crotch during a sneak attack
• Health bars on items you're trying to steal
• Kicks that send guards into the Earth's outer atmosphere

I'm sure there are other details that I'm missing but you get the point.

Acquire basically invented the 3D stealth genre with Tenchu. I haven't played Kamizawa but I will one day, and I'm glad we have it in English finally. Maybe this one isn't as good as Tenchu, I don't know. We'll see.

 

[iamthemilkman]

Two Worlds and MindsEye. Both of them often have terrible performance. That said, I liked both...

 

[Morgana Veil]

Need i say more?