What do you think about growing up and what it means??

[Ikagura]

Honestly, I believe the most important thing is an understanding of discipline.

Discipline can come in many forms, such as sport, dance (especially ballet), music (especially classical), etc etc. But the main thing is whatever discipline you learn, you will grow to understand that defeats = lessons which make you stronger.
Your persistence in the face of things which seem impossible, your overcoming of frustrations and defeats, your acceptance of training from people who know more than you (even when they criticize you) will ultimately result in you having strong mental fortitude. A vital component of "growing up".
And also it will result in a skill that will help you through your life journey.

Parents who truly understand this will raise strong children.

I really think that many in the last generations lack discipline (and since parents that never grew with any won't apply it to their own kids).

Not to say we should bring back physical punishment (I'd be absolutely against that because it can lead to issues later in life) I think it's never a bad thing to "correct" a kid that does not understand boundaries nor making efforts with discipline (like removing access to screens, forcing them to write an apology letter or even public apologies in front of the person they may have hurt with the presence of more than one witness).

And stop telling to kids that "they're unique" or "special" because they would think they don't have to make any efforts.

 

[kamille]

I don't think it even means much. It's not like i can afford to be independent or buy a house these days. Even If I'm ever mentally capable of that. So i wouldn't feel like an adult either way.

 

[TheWanderer]

I dunno but I think you just do your responsibilities
I'm seeking a job to help my family and all that
For now my goal is having a stable job and source of income and all the other shinanigans are secondary it's basically do what you want

 

[dropsmegamega]

Can't help but agree, you tell children that it's responsibility, or some understanding of people and the world, but a grown man can live much the way he did as a teenager in one instance, while a kid can have to be responsible for their family at a young age in another.

Growing is just getting older, hopefully you learn something.

It depends how you interpret the question. I'd say at least in this context growing up is different from just getting older, there's an implicit idea of self improvement. Furthermore, even if you live under a rock, you will accumulate experiences that will become your understanding of the world and define you, even if it is a distorted or incomplete understanding. But when that understanding is too incomplete people end up with no sense of reality, which is why so many people bring up stuff like responsibility and discipline...

But one thing I feel is missing from this thread: Growing up is also being able to think for yourself and to put things into question. As kids we are taught to always follow someone's orders, be it our parents, teachers or whatever. But in order to lead our own life and take our own decisions we must be able to confront figures of power. The point of teaching discipline is to prepare for that. Of course, there will always be things ruling us around to some degree as we live in society, but is exactly in the contradiction that we learn and improve. You don't just accept things in some fatalist way "ah the world sucks we are not special nothing can be done" you understand things in order to deal with then and change then. Hope and ambition are a necessity. After all life is constant change and honestly if you aren't improving you are regressing.

 

[ATenderLad]

It depends how you interpret the question. I'd say at least in this context growing up is different from just getting older, there's an implicit idea of self improvement. Furthermore, even if you live under a rock, you will accumulate experiences that will become your understanding of the world and define you, even if it is a distorted or incomplete understanding. But when that understanding is too incomplete people end up with no sense of reality, which is why so many people bring up stuff like responsibility and discipline...

But one thing I feel is missing from this thread: Growing up is also being able to think for yourself and to put things into question. As kids we are taught to always follow someone's orders, be it our parents, teachers or whatever. But in order to lead our own life and take our own decisions we must be able to confront figures of power. The point of teaching discipline is to prepare for that. Of course, there will always be things ruling us around to some degree as we live in society, but is exactly in the contradiction that we learn and improve. You don't just accept things in some fatalist way "ah the world sucks we are not special nothing can be done" you understand things in order to deal with then and change then. Hope and ambition are a necessity. After all life is constant change and honestly if you aren't improving you are regressing.

To me, that sounds too much like a putting a narrative on growing up, like a story. Life can be chaotic, and it's not an uphill trajectory. We can regress, get worse, follow dubious leaders, shrink into ourselves. Learning and growing is entirely dependent on the person, at every given moment, and almost no one is consistent. That's doubly true of matters of the heart, we do our best to remember the times we've been hurt, but so many of us make the same mistakes repeatedly. It's not weakness, or foolishness, life is just random and how we view it is subjective, we'll make of it what we will.

 

[dropsmegamega]

To me, that sounds too much like a putting a narrative on growing up, like a story. Life can be chaotic, and it's not an uphill trajectory. We can regress, get worse, follow dubious leaders, shrink into ourselves. Learning and growing is entirely dependent on the person, at every given moment, and almost no one is consistent. That's doubly true of matters of the heart, we do our best to remember the times we've been hurt, but so many of us make the same mistakes repeatedly. It's not weakness, or foolishness, life is just random and how we view it is subjective, we'll make of it what we will.

Life and human development is far from random. Conditions can appear chaotic, sure, but everything follows certain laws. We can have our subjective views, but there is a concrete reality. Yes, there will be ups and downs and nobody is consistent, but at the end of the day you either eventually learn from these experiences or you don't and let then slowly destroy you.

 

[Another Iori]

Becoming an adult means being able to provide for yourself and those around you, but also understanding that as a society everyone needs each other to live comfortably and that a balance must be found, between keeping all of this in harmony and at the same time, making sure you’re respected to truly express one's passions.

 

[ThirdEidolon]

Growing up is accepting your weaknesses, finding people who fill the gaps in your weaknesses and realizing that the idea of "adult" is just an idea, or even an ideal to strive for.

None of us really qualify and while it's good to try and mature and learn, you'll never be able to deny the child inside of you.

Schoolyard mentality never leaves. In the workforce, on social media, everywhere, there are cliques and people acting quite immature in all walks of life.

We never really grow up.
We're kids, with older lives, and more experience.
How we apply that experience is what denotes our level of maturity.

TL: DR.
We don't grow up. Our cells oxidize and that's the only real demarcation.

 

[MyNameIsJeff]

I'm only in my 20s so I'm far from having things figured out, but to me it means learning to focus on what you can change, accepting what you can't, not letting drama run your life, and finding time to do what you love. Things are rarely going to go exactly as you planned, but you can still find joy and victory in it. I may not have the kind of job or house I dreamed of as a kid, but I still have a lot of freedom, am building up savings fairly well, still have money left over for some of the stuff I couldn't have as a kid, and there's still time to improve my life further and maybe find a new calling. And DO NOT compare yourself to people on social media. People only show perfect snapshots of their lives and the algorithms are engineered to make you feel jealous and angry about everything.

 

[Ikagura]

School-yard mentality never leaves. In the workforce, on social media, everywhere, there are cliques and people acting quite immature in all walks of life.

So this is why we still end up having bullying at work? I thought that it was bullies that never matured beyond school (but managed to get a decent job) but then there are also bullied people that becomes the next bully (because of wanting revenge on life or something) but this is a vicious circle and won't end things.

Social Media are also bad because of anonymity making people feeling more legitimate to bully someone despite the rules and bans.

TwiX is also a place where you can send your army of followers to mass report someone so they get automatically banned just because they didn't like your new clothes.

 

[Bakuma1997]

A Rollercoaster, childhood is the pleasant lifting, while adulthood is a zigzag of ups and downs, every person grows different, so a clear answer is hard to get by, i only have one constant: Inevitability

 

[ThirdEidolon]

So this is why we still end up having bullying at work? I thought that it was bullies that never matured beyond school (but managed to get a decent job) but then there are also bullied people that becomes the next bully (because of wanting revenge on life or something) but this is a vicious circle and won't end things.

Social Media are also bad because of anonymity making people feeling more legitimate to bully someone despite the rules and bans.

TwiX is also a place where you can send your army of followers to mass report someone so they get automatically banned just because they didn't like your new clothes.

bingo. the reality is no one truly grows up. they fool themselves into thinking they have. a sign of maturity is realizing that you can still be petty and childish and keeping that in check.

Social media is not as bad as it once was. Mainly just minors causing trouble.

 

[NanoSoft]

Funny you mention Naruto, OP. I am watching Shippuden as well, still in it's beginning.

On topic, growing up seems to be a gradual process that's not readily perceptible until it creeps up on you one day. For me.....it's like now as a grown up I focus more on real life and it's tasks/responsibilities, while hobbies have fallen to the wayside. I still fight to keep that inner child alive and still take up my hobbies when I'm not dealing with the real life stuff. But it doesn't come as intuitively as when I was growing up and had less responsibilities and more free time to my passions. I wish it didn't have to be that way and I could be forever passionate, yet there are increasing responsibilities and duties to tend to the more you grow up.

 

[SeisShooter]

I should probably start off by saying that I don't think growing up and growing old are the same thing. Everybody grows old, not everybody grows up.

With that out of the way, I think "growing up," kinda boils down to three base ideas:

1) The ability to look inward and take responsibility for yourself and your actions.

2) The want to learn of your own volition, even if you must teach yourself.

3) The realization that the song "Hold on Loosely," is a disturbingly poignant piece of life advice for way too many situations, even beyond the context of the song.

Everything else about growing up just comes from various intersections between the three. Not everyone is good at all three and I'd argue the process of growing is the process of getting better at applying and understanding the three. But like many trios, there's an unresolved fourth; you never stop, you just keep getting a little better at 'em, slowly but surely.

 

[ATenderLad]

"Hold on Loosely,"

Unrelated but I just found out I can't read that without singing it, full volume.

 

[What's His Face]

There is little difference between my thought processes of me today than me at age 6. I still want to play all the time. I still want to sneak the pepperonis off the leftover pizza. I still want to cuddle with my family. I still want to grab my wooden sword and have sword fights with my neighborhood friends.

Growing-up, however, means...

I'm now too tired and in too much pain due to medical f-ups after working all day to play. I can't have pizza due to how unhealthy it is. My family is dead. My sword broke ages ago and my friends are either scattered to the winds or have already died as well.

That's all growing-up means to me. It may be different for those who kept tight-knit friendships, got married and had children of their own, etc. If so, I'm glad for you.