Third place(s)

[PrismRed]

I miss third places, granted I too don't like going outside, but it feels sad when I go to a mall or arcade and see it is now empty, almost devoid of life. Does people communicate entirely online these days?
I still go to arcade, usually the only new cabinets are for the rhythm games so I just play shooter or Daytona alone, sometimes showing off to kids on Tekken. Other than that, I hang around in my favorite Pizza spot, hanging around with friends there once every 3 weeks, yeah it's empty sometime but the owner is nice and the pizza is good, we always have a good time all around.

Do you guys have/had a go-to place to hang out besides home and workplace? Ever have an urge to go do something outside?

 

[DunkeyKong]

I'd love to go outside, like going to the mall and go to many stores, but most importantly…gaming stores! It's really fun to wander around and just see tons of consoles and games. Like the impulse store for example

 

[Ikagura Ikagura]

Do libraries count?

 

[Deleted member 884]

I'm a sort of a hikikomori, even though I go outside two or three times per week.

 

[ZombieFish]

I’m a big fan of “the woods.” There’s always millions of friends there. Are some of them spiders? Sure. But it takes all kinds, y’know?

 

[Ikagura Ikagura]

I'm a sort of a hikikomori, even though I go outside two or three times per week.

If you go outside at least once per week it's already better than many.

Honestly I wish libraries and other places were easier to access for people.

 

[DunkeyKong]

If you go outside at least once per week it's already better than many.

Honestly I wish libraries and other places were easier to access for people.

That's true, I think there's a good reason why it isn't easy to access those kinds of places, especially when there's many kinds of people

I’m a big fan of “the woods.” There’s always millions of friends there. Are some of them spiders? Sure. But it takes all kinds, y’know?

Ah the woods, the bears are kinda chill too

 

[Ikagura Ikagura]

That's true, I think there's a good reason why it isn't easy to access those kinds of places, especially when there's many kinds of people.

Maybe libraries have that connotation for being only for smart people...

 

[DunkeyKong]

Maybe libraries have that connotation for being only for smart people...

It could be that too, especially for someone quiet

 

[PrismRed]

Do libraries count?

Definitely.

I'm a sort of a hikikomori, even though I go outside two or three times per week.

Going outside even once per week is already good in my book.

 

[Ikagura Ikagura]

Going outside even once per week is already good in my book.

I thought that actual hikikomori never quitted their home for even a full month.

While going outside is tiring both physically and socially I couldn't see myself staying at home for that long.

Even going outside just for shopping or other task is nice for the brain.

 

[Pandaprewmaster325]

I frequent the mosque near me whenever I can.

I also go to a nearby sport stadium or a sports city its called that.

Sometimes I just wander in streets.

I find the best thing is to switch from extrovert to introvert and vice versa anytime you need to , going outside can take a lot of your time and sometimes you need to spend time alone but at the same time you also need constant human interaction no I don't mean your family just other people your neighbors , shop owners etc from now to july I will be going outside 5 days a week cuz of classes.

So yeah "touching grass" is important and third places count as "grass touching" activity even if you don't end up touching grass literally.

 

[99nereids]

my local gay club is a magical place going out to raves or concerts, haven’t been to one in forever but if you’re able to find any to go to they’re a fun way to meet people or just let loose & listen to what’s playing
I miss going to the mall! before the pandemic mine was already in the decline but at least was still somewhat lively. So many memories of lingering next to the large fountain or the food court to meet up with friends - trying to convince them that the food court restaurants are actually good, trust me bro - or seeing a cheap movie months after its release in the always dead attached-theater.
after the pandemic most shops there closed & the only real use the gigantic lot gets is for occasional fairs in the vast decaying parking lot.

 

[Deleted member 884]

Definitely.


Going outside even once per week is already good in my book.

For the record, just for an hour or so and only to go to see my grandma. If it wasn't for her, I'd stay at home 24/7.

 

[DunkeyKong]

For the record, just for an hour or so and only to go to see my grandma. If it wasn't for her, I'd stay at home 24/7.

That's so nice of you, I hope your grandma is doing well!

 

[Ikagura Ikagura]

I frequent the mosque near me whenever I can.

Honestly I feel embarrassed to go in any religious building if I'm not a believer (I'm not atheist though, I don't have any current religion or belief simply because I am not into institution nor having to follow any kind of leader but I'm not denying the existence of God or whatever created existence itself).

Those places are still beautiful architecturally and artistically speaking.

I find the best thing is to switch from extrovert to introvert and vice versa anytime you need to , going outside can take a lot of your time and sometimes you need to spend time alone but at the same time you also need constant human interaction no I don't mean your family just other people your neighbors , shop owners etc from now to july I will be going outside 5 days a week cuz of classes.

I sometimes feel that "extrovert/introvert" is another sociological concept that has overstayed its welcome like alpha and beta for wolf packs getting applied to humans.

So yeah "touching grass" is important and third places count as "grass touching" activity even if you don't end up touching grass literally.

I've always imagined it as a metaphor because some could literally have grass blades in their hand while staying in home.

my local gay club is a magical place

Is it like a bar or a different thing? Also can someone straight accompanying be there?

 

[DragonMals]

Do you guys have/had a go-to place to hang out besides home and workplace

The only time that I go somewhere other than home and work is the mall that's close to where my college is so that I can walk around for a bit before taking the next bus. It hurts to see how inflation in the US hit so big that everything, even the smallest of a snack, can be so expensive and how I have to see everything that I couldnt purchase be shown in the mall. I wished that i could have a reason to go to the mall other than waiting for the next bus. Hell, they even have a local Dave 'n Busters around the mall and when Ive checked it out after not going in one since... 2010? The place LACKED any of the popular arcade games that everyone knows and loves. I swear, where is Gradius? Where is Super Puzzle Fighter 2 Turbo? I just want to find good arcade places in Connecticut that contains these arcade games and whatnot. They have to be somewhere around...

 

[UnDubious]

I use to hang out at certain stores regularly, especially those that sold used CDs/tapes, books and games. They always had new stuff so just browsing was fun. Most of those are gone. In high school we'd always go to some cheap pizza place for lunch or some other spot and either eat there or outside. The woods are cool too. I worked from home for a few years and while it's fun at first, after a while I started hating being home all the time, I felt like a prisoner. I still take walks every day, I'd be depressed if I didn't.

 

[Egg (McMuffin) Man]

it feels sad when I go to a mall or arcade and see it is now empty, almost devoid of life.

Let me guess, you're American?

Shopping malls kind of failed in America. They had their hey-day but there's a variety of reasons why they died out and a lot of it comes down to malls going against the concept of a mall.

Malls are supposed to be a part of the community, somewhere with easy access where you can just hang out freely. It was meant to community hub and was based on European town squares. But they ended up putting a lot of the malls off the highway making them hard to get to and parking was always a problem, and then they started kicking out young people for hanging out and doing the thing that the space was designed for. It's no wonder they failed.

Idk about in other parts of my country but here in Tokyo malls are doing well because they still follow the concept of a mall. They're placed in the center of a community with multiple ways to easily access them, they have shopping dining and entertainment, and they don't kick out young people for hanging out and having fun. It's great.

I like the mall near my house. I can walk there or go by bike, and it's also connect to a train station (but I usually go by bike to save money). There's a grocery store, a bunch of restaurants, and some cool stores. There's also a large play area outside for kids, an area for sport teams to play, and a movie theater. We went yesterday and I bought my kids some stuff from the Lego store. I like going to the mall but I tend to spend a lot of money there so personally I would rather just stay home. Third spaces are important but as I get older I seem to be becoming less social and want to go out less and less.

 

[RustySK]

I mostly go to cafés and watch people do their thing these days when the need for social interaction becomes too great. Absolutely right there with you.

A couple years back there used to be this open plaza near my flat (pretty much an extended intersection, really) that had become an impromptu place for the whole neighborhood to hang out in the evening and drink a couple beers/eat a burger or whatever.
Not like everyone there interacted with everyone else all the time or anything, but it was just nice to be around people.
I especially remember one night where I had just had my heart broken and I was lying on the ground there, my head in a friend's lap and we just talked about it while some guys in cardboard robot costumes (probaby came back from some rave or whatever) were having a dance-off beside us. Good times.

The covid years (and gentrification) eventually killed that spot off, sadly enough. I really miss it.

 

[PrismRed]

Let me guess, you're American?

Shopping malls kind of failed in America. They had their hey-day but there's a variety of reasons why they died out and a lot of it comes down to malls going against the concept of a mall.

Malls are supposed to be a part of the community, somewhere with easy access where you can just hang out freely. It was meant to community hub and was based on European town squares. But they ended up putting a lot of the malls off the highway making them hard to get to and parking was always a problem, and then they started kicking out young people for hanging out and doing the thing that the space was designed for. It's no wonder they failed.

Idk about in other parts of my country but here in Tokyo malls are doing well because they still follow the concept of a mall. They're placed in the center of a community with multiple ways to easily access them, they have shopping dining and entertainment, and they don't kick out young people for hanging out and having fun. It's great.

I like the mall near my house. I can walk there or go by bike, and it's also connect to a train station (but I usually go by bike to save money). There's a grocery store, a bunch of restaurants, and some cool stores. There's also a large play area outside for kids, an area for sport teams to play, and a movie theater. We went yesterday and I bought my kids some stuff from the Lego store. I like going to the mall but I tend to spend a lot of money there so personally I would rather just stay home. Third spaces are important but as I get older I seem to be becoming less social and want to go out less and less.

Nope! I'm from some backwater country in Asia.

Here, only the really huge mall thrives, smaller ones are pretty much on it's last leg, usually holding on due to 1 or 2 popular restaurants.

From my experience going to Japan before, central Tokyo vibe is sorta different, the people are giving off strictly business-like attitude it's kinda hard trying to make small talk unless it's at a bar or something. While in rural areas and Osaka, people are much more welcoming, even though I can't speak Japanese.
I like how you don't really need to go the mall either to shop, and everywhere is theoretically reachable on foot too. I thought about this before maybe the lack of pedestrian walkway and necessity of cars to go anywhere socially affecting the community in the west.

 

[Pandaprewmaster325]

Honestly I feel embarrassed to go in any religious building if I'm not a believer (I'm not atheist though, I don't have any current religion or belief simply because I am not into institution nor having to follow any kind of leader but I'm not denying the existence of God or whatever created existence itself).

Those places are still beautiful architecturally and artistically speaking.


I sometimes feel that "extrovert/introvert" is another sociological concept that has overstayed its welcome like alpha and beta for wolf packs getting applied to humans.


I've always imagined it as a metaphor because some could literally have grass blades in their hand while staying in home.

Yeah I grew up with that mosque its near unrecognizable if you compare it to 2011 and how it looked then vs now , sometimes merchants sell stuff outside so its double the benefit by going there

I think the terms extrovert/introvert are more believable and have more science background than the alpha/beta thing.

And lastly yes it is indeed a metaphor for "go outside" but said in a insulting way cuz u know being mean on the internet gets you into the "cool kids club"

(Oh and the site seemed to be down for a bit)

 

[taigaisak4]

I'm a sort of a hikikomori, even though I go outside two or three times a week.

I also only leave the house to buy groceries and go to college (which is obligatory, unfortunately).

 

[Ikagura Ikagura]

Yeah I grew up with that mosque its near unrecognizable if you compare it to 2011 and how it looked then vs now , sometimes merchants sell stuff outside so its double the benefit by going there

I think the terms extrovert/introvert are more believable and have more science background than the alpha/beta thing.

And lastly yes it is indeed a metaphor for "go outside" but said in a insulting way cuz u know being mean on the internet gets you into the "cool kids club"

(Oh and the site seemed to be down for a bit)

I can understand donations for religious edifices but I'm not sure about selling stuff at the entrance.

True but I'm also kinda against putting people in boxes (like with Personality Types ranging from A to D or Theory X and Theory Y at the workplace). Many people are misusing scientific facts (like how the word "quantum" is being overused).

True, people acting like bullies on the Internet are actually the ones needing to touch grass instead of self projecting.

 

[Pandaprewmaster325]

I can understand donations for religious edifices but I'm not sure about selling stuff at the entrance.

True but I'm also kinda against putting people in boxes (like with Personality Types ranging from A to D or Theory X and Theory Y at the workplace). Many people are misusing scientific facts (like how the word "quantum" is being overused).

True, people acting like bullies on the Internet are actually the ones needing to touch grass instead of self projecting.

Yeah I do donate to the mosque sometimes if I can there is something about placing your hard earned money into a thing that helps the entire community it feels good man.

Now absolutely! We humans can change and are indeed the most complex of creations who walk this earth so deviations are very possible from the usual stereotype.

And yeah the internet has couple problems with taking everything as a joke they turned the pager incident into a meme.....its also quite nihilistic as heck and can make you see the world in a very negative light that's why touching grass will always be good.