Things that have inspired you

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Pretty self explanatory title. What are some things that have inspired you? Anything, whether its a thing like a game, a band, or maybe even people in your life. What has it inspired? Art? An ongoing project? For me its 3 Carls: Carl Sagan for his ease into the study of different science, Carl Jung for his understanding of the human psyche, and Carl the Llama because what's wrong with eating a guys hands? Also, Gogh and Vermeer; Gogh because he had quite a turbulent life I find quite similar to mine, though I'm not nearly as cool, and Vermeer because he's fucking Vermeer. Music wise I'd have to say Shin Ski and Nujabes but also Serj Tankian who, along with his band, kind of serves the same purpose as Carl Sagan in a way. What it inspires is a desire to have an ease in approach to attainable knowledge. I believe the internet has failed, or is failing, in it being the paradigm it thinks it is, but thats not entirely a fault of its own, some of it falls into its users. I have nothing coming from it as of now, but even just what I like to share here on forum post and such I feel educates to some degree even if I memeify it if you will. That memefying is where Mr. Sagan comes in, and if going foward we need to say maybe replace the girl with the pearl earrings as Pepe just to know who Vermeer even is then so be it. I think there's untapped potential lmao.

Anyway, so what are some of yours?
 
I have 2 inspirations:

- Caravaggio to paint hyperrealistic stuff. I was inspired to go beyond pencil drawings and I did make hyperrealistic paintings yet I realized it was an unnecessary pointless pursit. I shouldn't be a camera. Art is pointless without meaning and it doesn't look visually appealing. I noticed I was inspired with hyperrealism because it was a like a hard game for me to challenge myself to do something cool, but what I found was easy but very time waster thing that doesn't really worth it. Then I noticed what is really hard is not hyperrealistic painting but finding your own visual style that screams "it's your painting" so you don't have to butcher your art with your signature when you can make your own art style your signature so anyone who sees your artwork will know without a doubt that it's you who made this artwork. That is what I aim now. Fuck you Caravaggio for inspiring me wrongly lol.

- Beethoven for similar reasons as Caravaggio but about playing piano. Good game to play long ass rocket science pieces but that shit is actually boring to play, I prefer to listen to them!!! Then I had to realize if any pianist plays a piece they don't even enjoy to play then they are a show off. I never cared about wasting my life to show off!!! I just play like first half minute of Moonlight Sonata and call it a day!!! lol
 
The resillience of people battling chronic conditions have been my biggest inspiration as i too am in that bracket.

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-Nitzer Ebb. The band really helped me through a dark time with their music and continue to be a source of anarchy through persistence in my life

-The Adventures Of Sherlock Holmes radio play. I love me some old timey radio plays (listened to "A Prairie Home Companion" and "Adventures In Odyssey" frequently in my youth) and the Sherlock Holmes radio series with John Gielgud and Ralph Richardson as Holmes and Watson respectively was just absolutely enchanting

-The works of Steve Gerber. I was a pretty comic book obsessed kid in my youth (still kind of am) and no other comics spoke louder to me than Judge Dredd and Howard The Duck. I don't know what it is but in HTD, Gerber is the perfect mesh of Victorian era satirist and MAD Magazine lunacy. In Man-Thing, it's less of a 50's style monster comic and more of "the horrors man has wrought on himself". It's still a shame that he had to pass away so prematurely, I would have loved to have seen Steve react to modern day stuff

-Star Trek. Beautiful storytelling about the human condition upon facing numerous dilemmas. Even the soundtracks to TNG through Enterprise bring me a sense of peace and contentment
 
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My mom... For the amount of shit she had to put up with.

Life dealt her a rotten, cursed hand and has not eased up the pressure in the decades since, yet she continues soldiering on.

I want to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am and the kind of parent my mom is.
 
Stanley Kubrick and his films have always inspired me. This is a guy who never went film school, or had any form of higher education for that matter, and yet has gone down and is remembered as one of the most influential directors of all time. Despite having a career lasting over 40 years, he only made 13 films (Not counting the 4 documentaries he directed early in his career), but that fact always reminds me you need to value quality over quantity and that it doesn't matter how long something takes to get made, as long as you're passionate about it and truly believe in it, you'll always end up with something great. He also shows us the true strength of having control of your art. Kubrick was not only a director, but often the writer, producer and editor of his films also. He was often called a perfectionist (Something he would ironically always deny) because of his obsessive tendency to not stop filming anything until it was exactly as he pictured it in his mind (Infamously shooting nearly every scene anywhere from 30 to 50 times and in some cases over 100 times). All this to say; he inspires me to always hold a standard for your work and never lower it for anyone or anything, especially if you truly believe in what you're doing.
 
How sad it is I had to check what the concept of "inspiration" means? And I still can't wrap my head about what it really means. Anyway.

I have referents for art, sort of. Usually comic artists with a line work style I like. I wouldn't call them inspiration, they are just people that wrote or drew something I liked.

I got back into drawing a couple years ago after starting reading a comic ans joining their community. I found people that would take my hand and pull from it, see my paper sketches and tell me to keep doing it. And I kept doing, now finally having an artstyle I'm comfortable with. Pulling from me, these people inspired me.

And I think that is the point for me, I lack the push or understanding to do something on my own. I always need someone pulling from me, or redeeming what I do as "worth it". How do people manage to connect with something so much to have a drive of their own?

I always liked the idea of making a comic, but never had the push to do it. I admire those that have the push to make fan comics or projects in their free time, after work or while studying, because I never had such push. Feels like a chore, something I "have to do" instead of something I "want to do". And whenever I was able to at least write something, it always got scrapped. Everything feels like crap.

I have things I like, things that make me feel comfortable when surrounded by them, but not necessarily things that inspire me. It must be an issue on how I perceive things, most likely. Wonder if I will be able to change it. Maybe see things in a more positive light would help appreciate things better.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.
 
How sad it is I had to check what the concept of "inspiration" means? And I still can't wrap my head about what it really means. Anyway.
When something make you wanna do something in a way "damn it would be good to do it!!!" and what you wanna do is not the same as what make you wanna do, it means you are inspired. Watching a basketball player and wanna play it better than him by coming up with your own moves, eating an amazing cake and wanna cook something better than it with crazy ideas, reading your favourite comic and wanna create a comic you really would wanna do and all. It means when you wanna do it there is creative expression to project your own soul into it that creates fundamental difference from what inspired you so you wanna do something else entirely. Reading Harry Potter books and wanna write a story and people trapped in mirrors is an inspiration. Reading Harry Potter books but you twist it to Americanilized story is not inspiration.

On the contrary I do not think it's inspiration when Hideo Kojima takes tons of content from lots of stuff and merges it. When non-creative people wanna do creative work they steal, they are not inspired.

In this context it's not being inspired when you watch a basketball player and wanna play like him. It's being a wannabe. When you eat an amazing cake and wanna cook exactly something like that then it means you just wanna cook it, it's not inspiration. Reading your favorite comic book and wanna produce exactly something like that, it seems more like fan fiction thing despite how you took the source material and twisted for your liking and it became something else (like what Hideo Kojima tends to do).

I got back into drawing a couple years ago after starting reading a comic ans joining their community. I found people that would take my hand and pull from it, see my paper sketches and tell me to keep doing it. And I kept doing, now finally having an artstyle I'm comfortable with. Pulling from me, these people inspired me.
Nope they encouraged you.

And I think that is the point for me, I lack the push or understanding to do something on my own. I always need someone pulling from me, or redeeming what I do as "worth it". How do people manage to connect with something so much to have a drive of their own?

For example I don't care what others think. All my life no one encouraged me, they even made fun of my works yet like I give a fuck. Why I do what I do is just because for my own fun. I'm inspired and wanna do it because it is what I would do. I don't see creating artworks too different than being in the mood for watching and X movie and you just watch it. Do you need encouragements to enjoy watching movies, eating a food or buying whatever you want? You should only care about what you wanna do.

Then if you need encouragement to do anything then it means you don't really wanna do it. You may think "I always self-critize myself and believe I cannot do it so when people encourage me it make me pushed to do it" but when you wanna do something self-critizing yourself fuels you more to do it. Whatever I sucked doing before, it made me crush myself further to do it and be good at it because I wanna do it and naturally it make me wanna be better at it. What others would think about it has no relation to what I wanna do or something, that's why I cannot need nor care about encouragements. Whatever I do is my own self-satisfaction and if it cannot satisfy you only then you would need encouragement to satisfy someone else.

By being encouraged it seems you do it for others instead of yourself. Then you don't really wanna do it, but you care to do for other people like a service. For example I don't do anything for others, I don't care about service-logic. I won't be the guy to announce "I will do something" to judge positive feedback about it from society and just because people are happy with it I would wanna do it. That is not how my brain works. I may do whatever I wanna do and publish only some of them, not because I care what others think but just because I would use internet as my backup so I won't lose the works I care about. It also means whatever unsatisfactory artworks and whatnot is deleted by me never cared about their existence, and I would still delete them if everyone on Earth liked it lol.

I always liked the idea of making a comic, but never had the push to do it. I admire those that have the push to make fan comics or projects in their free time, after work or while studying, because I never had such push. Feels like a chore, something I "have to do" instead of something I "want to do". And whenever I was able to at least write something, it always got scrapped. Everything feels like crap.
Then you don't wanna do it. You'll do whatever you really want no matter what and you'll enjoy doing it. This is the "push" of what whatever you wanna do have an effect on you.

Then your case is more like "it would be nice if I did" situation. For example I also think "it would be nice to go to moon" but it is just "it would be nice", I don't really want it so I do nothing about it. I can live and die without having ever going to moon but if I do whatever I want it's just because I cannot do without and die before not ever doing it.

However mood thingy is a big factor on having a push or "repulsed" effect. Naturally when you are not in the mood to do anything to do it you would have to really force yourself, and then it would be a chore for you. Still you'll always have a mood to do anything you really wanna do, but the difference in your mood is just decision making compared to your current mood that changed your current behavior and that's why people do what they normally wouldn't.

I don't tell you my opinion because "you are wrong and I'm right", it's just for you to soul-search and get to know yourself better and correct yourself if you think whatever you believe about yourself is right or not. At least just a food for your thoughts.

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk!!! lol
 

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