Too lazy
What make you think you are lazy?
Can you tell some examples?
And what do you think you are supposed to do so that you no longer consider yourself lazy?
Basically that I never put into practice people's advice
I don't think that would be called laziness.
Maybe you don't consider them suitable for you?
What about the ones that I can perfectly do? Like exercise and meditation for example
Considering what you said earlier about helping with house cleaning and other tasks, i can say for sure that you are not lazy.
Also, laziness is not a global trait... it's not as if a person is simply lazy or not lazy.
Each person might be lazy in somethings while not being lazy in somethings else... and the list might change for that person over the time too.
Also, the reason for each thing that you think you are lazy about, might be different.
If there's something that you are really interested in not being lazy about, you can mention it here, so maybe a solution can be found for it.
Maybe most stuff that don't have to do with house cleaning
That's still too broad.
We know you are not lazy at somethings:
- House cleaning (physical labor)
- Math (logical labor)
- Video Games (patience, puzzle solving, memory)
- Using this forum (social interaction)
- Probably more...
Just looking at this list, i can say that you are good at anything you like.... in any category.
So probably you are not lazy, but just not motivated enough about somethings.
We know you are not lazy at somethings:
- House cleaning (physical labor)
- Math (logical labor)
- Video Games (patience, puzzle solving, memory)
- Using this forum (social interaction)
- Probably more...
Just looking at this list, i can say that you are good at anything you like.... in any category.
So probably you are not lazy, but just not motivated enough about somethings.
Recently i've listened to an episode of a podcast that talked about comfort zone and the benefits of trying new things(i would leave a link to it, but if i recall correctly its against the rules of the forum). Long story short, doing new things its like a self discovery journey, where you'll discover things that you didn't know you can do, form new perspectives, meet new people and so on. Ever since then, I've been forcing myself to try new things, cause most of my life I've been scared of doing things that i haven't done before, mostly due to the shame of failure. I've been doing some progress, but some things just feels impossible to do, like to ask a girl out. It's like an invisible barrier is blocking me. I'll get there eventually, but sometimes it feels that I'm too far away and never will manage to do it.
Anyways, sorry for the long block of text, just wanted to throw this out here and hear your perspectives on this topic of comfort zone
Anyways, sorry for the long block of text, just wanted to throw this out here and hear your perspectives on this topic of comfort zone
I think there's a fine line between getting out of your comfort zone and doing things that deep down DO make you uncomfortable. For example, I always hated parties and people that go to parties regularly; if I tried to "get out of my comfort zone" and try and get involved too, I wouldn't really be achieving anything more than give me headaches and tiring myself out. If the case was "I've always wanted to go to parties but I'm scared of it (for whatever reason)" then it's a MUST to beat that fear and then see if it's for you or not. I know some people that are pretty deeply disgusted with relationships due to prior experiences and sightings, so you can't really ask for people like that to go and date someone.Recently i've listened to an episode of a podcast that talked about comfort zone and the benefits of trying new things(i would leave a link to it, but if i recall correctly its against the rules of the forum). Long story short, doing new things its like a self discovery journey, where you'll discover things that you didn't know you can do, form new perspectives, meet new people and so on. Ever since then, I've been forcing myself to try new things, cause most of my life I've been scared of doing things that i haven't done before, mostly due to the shame of failure. I've been doing some progress, but some things just feels impossible to do, like to ask a girl out. It's like an invisible barrier is blocking me. I'll get there eventually, but sometimes it feels that I'm too far away and never will manage to do it.
Anyways, sorry for the long block of text, just wanted to throw this out here and hear your perspectives on this topic of comfort zone
I kinda had your issue some years back, so I'll tell you what worked for me: everytime I'm afraid to speak up or do something that I think its risky or embarassing in case of failing, I force myself to say it and then make sure to remember that moment and what happened afterwards. After some of those cases, you realize that whether you do/say it or not, most of the time, at the end of the day it had no real repercussions, and all that anxiety and doubt you had prior might as well been for naught. After some months you start having more confidence in saying or asking whatever you mean to. I was like you like two years back but now I'm gettin all the hoes, trust me
Don't mean to say you don't try, because I'm not you and can't know how much effort you put into this, but you can improve, and it seems you are serious on this. Don't give up. Blessings.
Thank you for the insight. I'm gonna apply this to my life for sure.I think there's a fine line between getting out of your comfort zone and doing things that deep down DO make you uncomfortable. For example, I always hated parties and people that go to parties regularly; if I tried to "get out of my comfort zone" and try and get involved too, I wouldn't really be achieving anything more than give me headaches and tiring myself out. If the case was "I've always wanted to go to parties but I'm scared of it (for whatever reason)" then it's a MUST to beat that fear and then see if it's for you or not. I know some people that are pretty deeply disgusted with relationships due to prior experiences and sightings, so you can't really ask for people like that to go and date someone.
I kinda had your issue some years back, so I'll tell you what worked for me: everytime I'm afraid to speak up or do something that I think its risky or embarassing in case of failing, I force myself to say it and then make sure to remember that moment and what happened afterwards. After some of those cases, you realize that whether you do/say it or not, most of the time, at the end of the day it had no real repercussions, and all that anxiety and doubt you had prior might as well been for naught. After some months you start having more confidence in saying or asking whatever you mean to. I was like you like two years back but now I'm gettin all the hoes, trust me
Don't mean to say you don't try, because I'm not you and can't know how much effort you put into this, but you can improve, and it seems you are serious on this. Don't give up. Blessings.
Another thing I mean when I say i'm lazy is that I do lots of stuff fairly slowly
There must be some factor that I'm not aware of that makes me keep thinking that I'm stupid and a bad person and all that, because you guys always remind me that I'm not.
It's called a low self-esteem. I know from a personal experience.
I already know I have low self esteem
I don't know where exactly this thread fits in? I'm writing here. Do you also know these constant mood swings or you are just tired and you don't feel like doing anything you see everything as a nuisance and would prefer to crawl into a hole.
Yes there they are again the depressions.
Unfortunately I also have this problem and have been fighting against this for years.
I don't understand it, it comes and goes, sometimes it's only short, sometimes it's very long and it tries to finish you off.
I try to deal with it as best as I can but it's hard and brutal.
Today was once again such a day, I often ask myself why I ? Why do I and certainly many others always have to go through this ! I'm sorry I don't want to bother you all with my problems.
Yes there they are again the depressions.
Unfortunately I also have this problem and have been fighting against this for years.
I don't understand it, it comes and goes, sometimes it's only short, sometimes it's very long and it tries to finish you off.
I try to deal with it as best as I can but it's hard and brutal.
Today was once again such a day, I often ask myself why I ? Why do I and certainly many others always have to go through this ! I'm sorry I don't want to bother you all with my problems.
I am 100% pharmaco-dependent.
Started with anti-epileptics at 11yo to stabilize my hypomania and my ADHD, so they also mixed Ritalin.
I did some experiments like using Cannabis instead of regular anticonvulsants, and it does work to flatten my mood swings, but it obviously is too fun and confusing with the hallucinations and enhancement of food and music.
With time and after several accidents, I am now ONLY taking Tramadol and Pregabalin for pain management.
Opioids are the perfect medicine if you can afford to be on them for life. I wish I was on real opioids, they up my Quality o Life too much, they fix my depression and bipolarity somehow they fix all the emotional pain as well, make me feel not vulnerable, and my best relationship was on them, I was a perfect person for a couple of years..
But then I could not find cheap farmaceutical grade opioids, so I had to substitute them with pseudo-opioid Tramadol which acts more like an Antidepressive with Pain Management than a proper Opioid.
Tramadol is like half painkiller half prozac, so I feel pretty mellow and content on it.
Without meds I would be dead already. Self-checkout.
Life is unbearable with my Autism-Bipolar issues, let alone chronic pain.
Addictions make things worst 10x at the very least 3 fold. Withdrawing recreational drugs on top of everything makes for AGONIZING HELL ON EARTH.
So I am more humble now and seek no pleasure nor grandeur, but pain-free detachment from raw-reality. No euphoria just a subtle mellow detachment.
Do not be afraid of switching doctors, and shopping for a liberal doctor who will prescribe more experimental off-label stuff like Ketamine. Drugs are real tools that can make life good for people like us.
Started with anti-epileptics at 11yo to stabilize my hypomania and my ADHD, so they also mixed Ritalin.
I did some experiments like using Cannabis instead of regular anticonvulsants, and it does work to flatten my mood swings, but it obviously is too fun and confusing with the hallucinations and enhancement of food and music.
With time and after several accidents, I am now ONLY taking Tramadol and Pregabalin for pain management.
Opioids are the perfect medicine if you can afford to be on them for life. I wish I was on real opioids, they up my Quality o Life too much, they fix my depression and bipolarity somehow they fix all the emotional pain as well, make me feel not vulnerable, and my best relationship was on them, I was a perfect person for a couple of years..
But then I could not find cheap farmaceutical grade opioids, so I had to substitute them with pseudo-opioid Tramadol which acts more like an Antidepressive with Pain Management than a proper Opioid.
Tramadol is like half painkiller half prozac, so I feel pretty mellow and content on it.
Without meds I would be dead already. Self-checkout.
Life is unbearable with my Autism-Bipolar issues, let alone chronic pain.
Addictions make things worst 10x at the very least 3 fold. Withdrawing recreational drugs on top of everything makes for AGONIZING HELL ON EARTH.
So I am more humble now and seek no pleasure nor grandeur, but pain-free detachment from raw-reality. No euphoria just a subtle mellow detachment.
Do not be afraid of switching doctors, and shopping for a liberal doctor who will prescribe more experimental off-label stuff like Ketamine. Drugs are real tools that can make life good for people like us.
I'm sorry for that. I've been thinking about trying yoga, my doctor also says try it.
Well, I can help you since I cured my depression going on several years now.
Although posting such a reply is treading the water when it comes to rules so I'll try my best describing my methods without becoming political or sexual. If it's still a problem by all means lock/delete my message.
Try limiting or outright not engaging in any explicit material from images to videos. I eventually came to the realization that Ԁornography (ɥentai etc.) is nothing more than indulged fantasy created delusions, including fetishes which are unhealthy, unnatural and unrealistic!
After 42 days of not engaging in any explicit material
It was also psychological through Fantasy. When you are watching explicit content you are engaging in watching fantasy, which could be for many, a form of escapism. In my case I only recognized this years later which eventually help me escape this cycle I was in. I realized the women in 99% videos were fake, nothing was authentic, the women were not having honest pleasure, the situations and activities were fictitious. But when people continuously watch these types of sexual videos on a daily basis you being to imagine it as real. This leads to objectifying, and developing fetishes, which contributes to an unhealthy addiction. I advise you take a perspective in the opposite sex reality of pleasure, and healthy relationship you will come to see it is very different than your warped reality.
Throughout history watching or creating explicit content was common and tolerable but not on the same level of what we have today. Imagine if the men who were responsible of creating civilization today were addicted to vicious "fantasy" of explicit content sexual videos we have today - they would most likely not accomplish the tasks they have today.
I understood my journey of overcoming explicit content addiction all started with my own realization that the reason why I watched these videos were to escape from the reality I was in by watching these fantasies. But that lead me down a very insidious path in which I developed fetishes ultimately leading me to a huge discovery that the women (or men) involved in these videos/acts were not genuinely happy or feeling genuine pleasure (in a healthy way) and was only for the money.
Although posting such a reply is treading the water when it comes to rules so I'll try my best describing my methods without becoming political or sexual. If it's still a problem by all means lock/delete my message.
Try limiting or outright not engaging in any explicit material from images to videos. I eventually came to the realization that Ԁornography (ɥentai etc.) is nothing more than indulged fantasy created delusions, including fetishes which are unhealthy, unnatural and unrealistic!
After 42 days of not engaging in any explicit material
- My energy has never been higher,
- My mind and memory very clear,
- My assertiveness is ready for anything.
It was also psychological through Fantasy. When you are watching explicit content you are engaging in watching fantasy, which could be for many, a form of escapism. In my case I only recognized this years later which eventually help me escape this cycle I was in. I realized the women in 99% videos were fake, nothing was authentic, the women were not having honest pleasure, the situations and activities were fictitious. But when people continuously watch these types of sexual videos on a daily basis you being to imagine it as real. This leads to objectifying, and developing fetishes, which contributes to an unhealthy addiction. I advise you take a perspective in the opposite sex reality of pleasure, and healthy relationship you will come to see it is very different than your warped reality.
Throughout history watching or creating explicit content was common and tolerable but not on the same level of what we have today. Imagine if the men who were responsible of creating civilization today were addicted to vicious "fantasy" of explicit content sexual videos we have today - they would most likely not accomplish the tasks they have today.
I understood my journey of overcoming explicit content addiction all started with my own realization that the reason why I watched these videos were to escape from the reality I was in by watching these fantasies. But that lead me down a very insidious path in which I developed fetishes ultimately leading me to a huge discovery that the women (or men) involved in these videos/acts were not genuinely happy or feeling genuine pleasure (in a healthy way) and was only for the money.
quoted from one of my recent profile posts:
"my pendulum swings too far too fast too often... felt great most of the day n now I'm sittin here with stupid suicidal BS comin over me in waves makin me feeL like my nerves bein torn out of me... positive thinking feels like it's all blocked off n out of reach... unsure of what to do or take cuz if I pick the wrong thing, the worst is likely to intensify... other friends aLL out somewhere or sleepin... everything's fine. I'm too strong to fall for brain-chem trickery... a really painful gulp.... I can feel this dark place inside asphyxiating me... can't reason out an intelligent choice... it's not sad or anything to worry... this is how things work... in me idk... everything's fine cuz it will be fine overaLL cuz I'll find a way or if I can't I'll fuckin... make one. don't wanna try drinkin this away... an illusory road... just plz synergy of the universe... ease up whydon'tcha... why do I have to be everybody n every fuckin thing... to attain being no one"
there's another one where I make the distinction between an outside/inside-stressor developed depression n a clinical one - but can't find it lol
Post automatically merged:
here's a sampler of my project 'The Horror of the NexT D a y" that I use to help deal with these nearLy-impossible-to-face inner-fiascos - not sure if you or everyone would dig it or resonate with but it's definitely not limited to symphonic gothic/doom meuLz/post-punk genre-wise
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Yeah, when my mother used to bully me I would end up hurting myself.
I would hit myself or cut myself, just not to hurt her I guess.
I know that feeling, I hope you feel better later.
I would hit myself or cut myself, just not to hurt her I guess.
I know that feeling, I hope you feel better later.
Ok then why did you laugh at me?
Oh it was not at you at all, it was a sympathy laugh with you
as in "aint life shitty, right?!" - "huh... yeah lol..."
That is why I explained ive been there.
I do laugh at myself a lot though
It does help. A bit.
as in "aint life shitty, right?!" - "huh... yeah lol..."
That is why I explained ive been there.
I do laugh at myself a lot though
It does help. A bit.
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