Random How do you wipe?

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Do you sit? Do you stand? Do you fold the toilet paper? Do you crumple it? Do you wrap the toilet paper around your finger and scoop it out like a fresh November pudding?
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Hand-standing on the tank, wiping with my toes. I only wish I was able to see the paper glide gracefully through the air and descend into the bowl. But alas, I must face the wall.
Our God is a cruel ruler. A crueler.
 
it depends but i have to wipe 3 or 4 times due to my colon going up my ass more due to ostamy bags. (2 of them BTW)
 
Standing. Folded. I always wondered how people perform excrement excavation whilst still sitting on the throne. Like, there are legs and stuff in the way, yo.

Also...bidets. if I won the lottery and didn't want to spend the money on other stuff, I'd travel the world as a Bidet Advocate, educating the masses concerning water for their asses. Clean the tush! Drown the starfish! Bidets!
 
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I mainly use this but I have a concentration spell going which turns my asshole into a pocket dimension. Haven’t thought about relieving myself in ages.
 
i scare the poop away
 

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