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If a character wants to call themselves a grey jedi they certainly can, but the jedi were an actual order with certain rules and beliefs. If you don't follow them you can't call yourself a jedi and have it actually mean anything to someone who was actually from the jedi order. A real jedi wouldn't recognize you as one. That's why Ahsoka stop calling herself one. She had a bit of a falling out with the jedi order and left them to go off on her own.Okay, well it's still a thing whether you agree with it existing or not.
So called grey jedis aren't jedis or Sith. They are individuals who happen to be force sensitive and are just doing their own thing, which is fine. They're basically not on either team, although Ahsoka still is for all intents and purposes a light side force user. So even if you're not a jedi or a sith you're still ultimately using one side of the force or the other. There's no middle option, it's just light side and dark side. That's just the way George Lucas set it up