How do you guys gonna play EDF then?
That's easy: either Wing Diver for maximum mobility or a tank so there's a layer of metal between me and them. Jaw tense, palms sweaty, letting out small grunts, channelling my anger instead of my fear, and keeping at maximum range.
Phobia is about sensory stuff. I can't stand things jumping at me or crawling all over, or hearing the sound of too-many legs, but most of the time, I don't really have a choice. Even Half Life 2's headcrabs and antlions used to make me uneasy. But then, a lot of times, spiders are designed more monsterous than spider-y, and that takes the edge off. I've heard the same thing about coulrophobia: monster clowns=fine, real clowns=bad. I'd assume Dark Souls' spider-lady boss isn't triggering a lot of arachnophobia.
All things considered, EDF has semi-realistic unbelievably huge insects that you get to blow up to pieces, along with a bunch of other weird stuff; it's mostly fine for me, but I can understand why someone would rather avoid it entirely.
The thing is, about the "go play something else/get over it" angle, is that it's really just unhelpful and unnecessary. Everyone who's going through those types of mental blocks is either already looking into avoiding it, getting over it, or
gasp! Both. But such is the world that every twenty minutes, someone comes up with the radical new thought of "I don't have that mental thing; but I sure have an uninformed opinion about it!"