people only contact you when they need something

[Sinsic30]

I was just thinking about this the other day - there are ppl who only call/text me when they need something - other than that they never hit me up to say hi - at first I was thinking that they are using me for said things I can provide for them - but then again I really don't call/text them either - that being said I don't hit them up if I need any thing - if that makes sense - I guess the point I'm trying to come down to is if - it's normal for you to only get contacted - from ppl if they need something - and it starts feeling like thats all they use you for? maybe it's a special discount you can get - or knowledge that for some reason they only think you have access too ...lol - LMK

 

[SamanthaSamantha's icon]

I hate it when people do that... And most aren't even subtle about it — there's no "prep work" or even the tiniest of efforts to make it look like anything other than transactional.

Fuck you, I ain't your maid (but I COULD be if on payroll xD).

 

[bombatomba77]

sI get it. I'm in IT and it's all the time. Granted my mind if kind of geared towards this kind of problem solving, so it's not all bad, but when someone in my house wants to print something and they yell that the printer won't work (I use an HP Laserjet 1022 attached to a RPi Zero W print server) I inwardly seethe. And it's ALWAYS when I sit down and get comfy

 

[lestagio]

I was just thinking about this the other day - there are ppl who only call/text me when they need something - other than that they never hit me up to say hi - at first I was thinking that they are using me for said things I can provide for them - but then again I really don't call/text them either - that being said I don't hit them up if I need any thing - if that makes sense - I guess the point I'm trying to come down to is if - it's normal for you to only get contacted - from ppl if they need something - and it starts feeling like thats all they use you for? maybe it's a special discount you can get - or knowledge that for some reason they only think you have access too ...lol - LMK

It's pretty damn common, but I wouldn't say it's "normal" if that makes sense. I've stopped talking to a lot of people I used to hang out with because they turned out to be somewhat dicks, but I'll still get the occasional text, overly nice: "Hey Lestagio! I was wondering if you could help me move this weekend? You'd be a huge help. You know how it is, the kids make it so stressful these days, haha!"

Mind you I haven't received a text from them in about 2 years... I'm genuinely fine if someone wants to get back together with me or mend a friendship, but I'm not gonna waste my weekend to do YOUR chores... Some people love the guilt tripping too.

 

[Den MDM Den MDM]

Despite how sad it is to be contacted for those reasons only, I came to prefer direct calls for help instead of those people that mask it with small talk, flattery or similar stuff.

It just feels more fake when people set the conversation up with asking how I've been, what I'm doing, etc. Like, just say how much money you need and get out.

To make up for this sad ordeal, I do check up on people without expecting anything. Maybe it helps them realize their worth.

 

[GeoHikari]

Every week in my life. I think that them likes to try learning something about a thing who they isn't like to learn themselfes,

Sad not everyone likes to read books.

 

[FarJyyUir]

My brother is like this with other members of our family. He will call them, observe them, & drop them for good. Says he won't deal with dead weight.

Recently I was guilty of this last week, when I called him to help me deal with a personal issue of mine. I've yet to reciprocate.

 

[RageBurner]

People like that are a blessing in disguise; they are not worth serious emotional investment, which means one can, then, devote affection towards the ones that matter.

 

[LiberoVulpesLiberoVulpes's icon]

Since I don't like to be bothered, I have 2 solutions, either hide how capable I actually am, or do the job so badly they don't ask for my help ever again.

You cannot be used if they think you are useless.

I suppose being a Humanities Major serves to sell the idea of me being practically useless.

 

[extermist]

I've lost family this way.
They always asked for help, we gave what we could, but eventually we couldn't give anything.
Got to the point that we weren't answering their calls because everyone expected that they just needed something.
Then we got the news they were gone, turns out they were sick but never told anyone.

 

[Stare best girl]

turns out they were sick but never told anyone.

that's how I lost my brother, he already knew that will die and his heart wasn't working told to his girlfriend and some friends but not me, my parents and my sister

while I understand that he did that to not worry us but damn, we're his family! and doesn't help that my sister and his girlfriend told him to go doctor but nope, he refused and instead go work