Movies A historically accurate Minecraft Movie

[CyberRabbit]

While in bed thinking about god knows what this came to my mind, what if the Minecraft movie was historically accurate to the game? So I decided to script a short scene, enjoy ;)

(Somewhere in Steve’s fortress)
Steve: Welcome to the trading hall
Henry (the red sweater kid guy if you forgot): Steve? Why are there poor innocent things in those small holes in the wall?
Oh those, they are the villagers, and they are there for trading, just like Joe over here, let’s see if he gots any Books of mending IV here.
(Steve sees Joes items)
Ohhh that’s bad Joe, not even a mending I?
So you’re gonna let him go now, right?
Henry, pull the lever.
Will this let him go?
WHY WONT YOU ANSWER ME?!
WILL THIS LET HIM GO?’
Pull the lever, Henry.
(Henry pulls the lever unknowingly droop lava on the villager)
HOLY S—T STEVE, HE DYING, WHAT THE F—K MAN?!
(Steve begins to sing)
La-la-lava
Vi-vi-villager
Steve’s lava torture machines yeah it’s epic as hell!!
Oh sweet mama-cita now you telling who’s the boss!!
YOUR INSANE, THE TIME YOU’VE BEEN HERE HAS MADE YOU A MONSTER!!!!
Henry, it’s just business, he didn’t have a mending IV so he gets the bucket
It’s kinda like a you eithe— (he gets interrupted by Henry)
STEVE YOU JUST KILLED A F—KING MAN, DONT YOU FEEL A LITTLE BAD?!
Ummmmm, no, not a little

 

[Stingy Perry Stingy Perry]

 

[Clippy]

There is room for a historically accurate movie with that angle in mind. It would be a very sad movie.

 

[DunkeyKong]

View attachment 91660
There is room for a historically accurate movie with that angle in mind. It would be a very sad movie.